How my life plan for 2014 didn't work out and why I'm okay with it

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Hello, nice to see you
I'm neither excited nor upset that you're here
And this is why:

During my freshman year of high school, I decided that I should probably try and figure out a life plan for myself. Decide what my college major could be, think about getting a job, what college(s) I should look into applying for, decide if I wanted to take any work experiences courses, get a bank account, save up for a car, etc.

 

My plans during my Freshman and Sophomore years of high school

College Major:

• I was 14 and at a total loss at what I wanted for myself. I remember telling myself in elementary school that I would never, ever want to be a teacher because I couldn't see how anyone would want to go back to school from 8am-3pm after finishing college. I thought that I might want to be a P.E. teacher because I was was really good at Martial Arts so I thought P.E. would be easy enough. I decided that I would sign up for the Majors Program that my High School had offered. It was basically an extra curricular course that would help students decide what major to study in college and get them a head start on what to expect their college work to be. I was still completely undecided on anything that I wanted to study, so I signed up for the Business Major thinking it was a general study that could take me in multiple directions once I figured out what I wanted to do. I was in the program for about 6 months before I dropped out because I wanted to train at my studio more than I wanted to be working on reports and going to meetings for school after I had been stuck in school till 2:45pm every day. 

Getting a job:

• At the end of my freshman year, I decided that my summer vacation would be my last "play time summer vacation" and that I needed to have a job by next year. The only probably was that I was only 14 and you had to be 16 to get a job. During my sophomore year, one of my best friends at the time told me that she worked at the Roller Dome as a party hostess and that her boyfriend's mom was her boss. She ended up talking to her for me and I got a job there for a few months. It was a ton of fun, especially as my first job! (Though I will admit that it was extremely awkward working there when my ex-boyfriend worked at the pizza place that was inside the Roller Dome..) I ended up quitting that job about 3 months later for multiple reasons...

College Campuses:

• I couldn't see myself leaving California, but I knew I had wanted to go away to college. I thought about attending California Lutheran University, but I was completely against it because I wanted that "college experience" of living in a dorm. The only problem was that the campus was a whopping half mile away from my parents house. Why would I pay for housing when I could live at my parents for free?! But I didn't want to live at my parents.. I wanted to move out.. I there weren't many campuses that I was dying to apply to, especially since I still hadn't figured out what my major was going to be. My next idea was to attend California State University, Northridge. It was only about 30-40 minutes away, so it was far enough away that I could feel like I "went away" to college, but close enough to home that I wouldn't get home sick. 

My plans during my Junior and Senior years of High School

Right after Sophomore year had ended, it was safe to say that my plans had completely fallen apart. I still had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and quite honestly, I had gotten to the point where I just didn't care. I had too many family issues going on at that time that I was just going to be grateful if I had even lived to see my high school graduation.

Getting a job, again

• All of my family drama started to get worse and worse. By Christmas during my Junior year, I decided that I needed a job just to support myself in ways that my parents couldn't. I talked with my karate instructor and told him what was going on. He agreed to hire me, but I wasn't getting paid very much. But hey, at least I had a job, right? 

Do I have a major yet?

• I still had no major at that point.. Then Jayson (this was the year we met and started dating) gave me the suggestion that I should look into studying Child Development since I was so good at teaching martial arts. That seemed like a great idea and I figured it wouldn't take much effort (or not nearly as much as some other majors) to graduate college. 

College: 

• Since I still couldn't decide on a University, I decided that I would just do what a majority of my graduating class would do and attend Moorpark Community College for two years and graduate with my Associates degree. It's a start, right? 

How I followed my plans, created new ones, and why they all didn't work out

So I reached the end of my Junior year and I had a job, a major, and picked a college. Great! I got this alllll figured out :] Senior year was fun, easy, and I was SOOO ready to start college! I decided that I wanted to get my associated done and over with, ASAP, so I ended up signing up for the Summer 2010 semester at Moorpark, which means that I had a 4-day break from graduation to my first day of college. I only took one class that summer, just so I could make sure that I could keep up with the work load. Jayson and I ended up taking the same class together so he could help me if needed. I finished the semester and signed up for Fall semester. I had all child development courses as well as a few Institute (church) classes , so my semester was down right easy as can be. I ended up finishing that semester with my first ever straight A report card! I was feeling amazing! At that point I knew that I would be graduated from Moorpark with my Associates Degree by Fall of 2012.

Spring 2011 semester began. I was taking Psychology, Political Science, and Meteorology. Within a month, I was failing every single class. I was absolutely devastated.. My 4.0GPA that I had worked so hard for was falling down the drain. The only way I could save it was to completely drop out that semester so that none of my grades would show up on my transcripts, so that's what I did... Good bye 2012 graduation.

Jayson ended up getting his mission call about a month after I dropped out. He was going to be leaving in May. If I didn't get myself back on a college plan, I'd never be able to get anywhere. I randomly decided to try cosmo school. I decided that I would be graduated by the time he would get home (which would have been May 2013). I started looking at schools in Utah. I was baptized at this point, and had never been up there before, so I thought it would be a fun experience. I ended up enrolling at Mountain land Applied Technology College and was going to move into Alpine Village with my friend Jessica, which was down the street from BYU. In June of 2011, after Jayson had left on his mission, I went up to Utah with some friends and was on my way to pay for school and my apartment in Utah. I didn't have enough money and still had until August to pay for everything, so I came back home. About 3 weeks later, Jessica's boyfriend had gotten home from his mission and they had gotten engaged, so we weren't going to be room mates. I was super sad, but was still excited about getting 3 other room mates. Then about a week later, Jayson came home from his mission due to illness. So he was home in California....why in the WORLD would I want to go to Utah now? I declined my application to MATC and sold my apartment contract. 

Now I'm back to square one

No major

No school

...but I got a job at Red Robin. 

1 goal down, 2 to go

Lets fast forward a bit: Jayson and I got married in August of 2011, moved to Utah in November of 2011 because he got an amazing job offer, so we decided to just stay out of school for a year and save money. Well, 2012 came and we found out that Jayson's opportunity to work and go to school at the University of Utah wasn't going to work due to complications with work, so we moved home in July of 2012. I finally went back to school in Fall 2012, and ended up failing..again. I lost any desire to go back for Spring 2013. I had a few jobs and none of them really seemed to work out.. Jayson was still job-hopping as well and we both were just at a loss with what to do.

In May of 2013 he got an offer to try out a summer sales job in Denver, Colorado. We decided to take it and lived in Denver from May-July of 2013. It ended up working out great!! So much so that they offered Jayson a franchise for ADT Home Security. So we now own our own business :] 

We have our own home and we moved in in August 2013. My brother moved in with us in December and now he's graduated from high school and starting college with Jayson this semester at Moorpark.

~ ~ ~

So lets look back here. 

I was supposed to be graduated from Moorpark College in Summer/Fall of 2012

Then I was supposed to be graduated from MATC with my Cosmetology license by April of 2013. 

Now it's 2014 and I am no where near being close to graduating in any field. 

And that's okay. 

The past 4 years have been crazy. It's been hard watching other people from my high school graduating class post all of these pictures of them graduating college or talking about how they will be graduating at the end of this semester. It's hard watching so many people get accepted into jobs that have any sort of relation to their field of study. It's hard watching people who are younger than me achieve all of these life goals that they had since they were 14-15. And here I am, sitting here like rock compared to them. But it's okay. 

I learned a lot of things during the time that I was "supposed" to be a college student. But through all those times of telling myself that I should be a college student, I had the Lord to rely on. I wasn't just a college student.. I was a wife. I had to be a wife/best friend/cook/cleaner/therapist/doctor/teacher/etc. Would I change any of that for a moment? No way. I am GRATEFUL for the life I have and where I am with it. Do I wish that I was, or am going to be, a college graduate? Of course I do. But maybe that life just wasn't for me. Yes, I had opportunities to make it that way, but I am grateful that I took every opportunity for it to not be that way. The Lord knows me. He has a plan for me. Who knows, maybe I was supposed to stick with school and get it done, but I had to learn how to take my own life plans and make sure they were in line with what my Father in Heaven had in store for me. That is my goal for 2014. To stop thinking about where the world thinks I should be, and start focusing on what He has in store for me. And if that means that I'm to just be a house wife, a mom, a college student, a sister, a best friend, a whatever it is that I'm supposed to be, then I am going to be just that. If this is what I need to learn and grow and, eventually, be the best parent that I can be, then now is the time for me to learn that. The best thing that I could do for myself, and my family, is to be a daughter of God, and learn to completely submit myself to the Lord.

If I can do that, then I have accomplished all that I've ever wanted to and more for 2014.